PEARL TECH 101 THE ART OF MAKING YOUR MEN KINDER, MORE EVOLVEDMARRIED WOMEN are like busy little OYSTERS. They take this aggravating gnat sized male mind, this grain of irritating gravel called 'a man' who RUINS the peaceful, smooth interior of their heart, mind and home and, in order to tolerate this piece of crud there, they secrete and create a lustrous substance all around the man so as NOT to feel HIM all irritating, alien, sharp, ego-maniacal, blunt, pain creating which he is.
In the doing, they learn to banish many of the common foibles of women (indeed of all humans,) irritation, chronic thinking, judgmentalism, chronic analyzing, talking to oneself angrily all the time and then the hair triggers that make one yap off at others.
The point is, the worse a man is, the more useful he is for making you into BUDDHA! The more you're tempted to go on an internal mental rampage, the MORE YOU CATCH YOURSELF and develop CONTROL of your own hormone leaps. The the more you say to yourself, Ďenough, shut up, be non judgmental,í the more you are working against what is AUTOMATIC in YOU.
The more you work against the automatic, banal, petty and create that peaceful, unrippled pool of blue.....the more you make the world a better place to live in. Remember, she who takes issue, umbrage, who reacts, who collects injustices, who walks around irritated at others.....creates just as much suffering in the world as those who irritate her.
So what if he's sloppy, angry, forgetful and doesn't cater to your needs? Those aren't deal breakers. So he fools around with other women, drinks, gambles and smokes? He pays for the kids, doesn't he?. Over enough years, all this foolishness slows down, -- it has to. The flesh is mortal. Eventually the man turns into a perfect PEARL.
It takes time, sure.....but the wily oyster has time. She's not going anywhere. She cant! She's an OYSTER fergawdís sake. She is rooted in that home and kitchen and her kids are there rooted with her. She cant just wander off no matter how grizzly the irritating grain of sand!
So she does this pearl work on the sand grain not out of kindness but SOLELY not to be irritated by him. She turns him into something valuable and immortal just not to have him ITCHING/ SCRATCHING HER. Its blind self interest. The payoff is only partly what happens to this piece of obdurate rock man.
No longer thin, biting and sharp, he gathers an aged burgundy wine smoothness, he reflects light in a soft way. He is rounded out. A JEWEL! But the real payoff is what happens to HER! She sends a really spiritualized man into the world to conduct business with kindness, manners. Because HE LEARNS from her, oh yes. He may not be polite to HER, but he now knows POLITE is what cuts it and he goes into the world politely. He has shame, He has decency. Things he learned from her.
Do you know what lucky karma this MANUFACTURER OF HUMANS, the woman, GETS? She not only made a son, she created a HUSBAND. Did it out of rude clay, too. I mean look at an 8 to 18 yr old male and you know that's a rude bit of business. ME ME RUN RUN. Lie Lie.
And in their hearts beats rage, which woman's heart does not know. Women know WOUND. Men have rage. And rage, probably like wound, festers and gets worse over the years. So the only rule at polishing a male pearl you're building is to do so at very regular intervals.
EVERY single time you sense that a male, a son or mate or BF or boss is offended, do a question/ answer survey that cleans the schmutz off his fragile skin. "Sweetie? Did I offend you?" They'll say no. "But when I did X,what did you feel?" That approach gets a better response, more truthful. He tells you, very hard for him to remember feelings or even feel them when he' sharing them, but he goes at this 'try.' Very important you answer each utterance thoughtfully, feeling, apologetically. That's the cleaning off part. You must apologize, go on record with a vow never to do that again. If you don't do cleanup to his satisfaction, it will fester and one day you'll have someone who has seen twenty similars of your original sin, is convinced you're a bad lady.
Ladies, no matter what the reason, keep on doing what you're doing. The progress seems SLOW inside there, in the dark under the pier; its cold, its wet but KEEP on slogging, keep on SECRETING that pearl material that is going to transform the little jerks around you. After all, you're doin' Godís work. GOD couldn't make him understand reason, civilized ways, not in about twenty thousand lifetimes, so GOD has had to defer to the expert and he has hired YOU.
In thanks for working this little bugger over, God will give you annnnnnnnything you want. That's why he invented community property, shopping, credit cards, jewelry, dancing lessons and dental braces for kids, and a whole lot more ---building your own website, going to the best yoga teachers and gurus then passing the info on at your website!
Be smart. SECRETE pearlescence! That means donít tell the truth all the time unless you make it drip iridescently. Doll it up a little. Speak no evil, think no evil, do no evil. Be enigmatic, silent, always smiling. Keep your voice low and sweet like pearlescent HONEY. Drape him in those tones. Praise him for the least manifestation of kindness. Acknowledge how great he is in the world, what fine work he does. And acknowledge in front of his friends.
If you have to say something accusatory, afterwards when his face is scrunched up to yell, say thoughtfully ĎI only mentioned this event and look how ugly and upsetting. Donít be mad at me for mentioning it, I only mentioned it. You actually did it!" And wander off pondering the riddle of it all. Pithy non-sequiteurs. But gentle ones. That's pearl tech 101.
People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and thatís what everyone wants.
But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything thatís holding you back,
the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.
A true soul mate is probably the most important person youíll ever meet, because they tear
down your walls and smack you awake.
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