HOW TO RUN AN ONLINE CONSULTANCY BUSINESS -- the MONEY end of
it!

In 1969, I returned to my home
town, Los Angeles with four Spanish speaking children between zero and five
years old. Like many mothers of infants, toddlers, plus a grade school child, I
couldn’t afford daycare and had to stay home and make lunches, pick them up at
school, push a cradle and grow vegetables if I wanted to eat. The DPSS wanted
me to live on 123$ a month foodstamps, 250$ rent & utility money. No can
do, I told them. “Then get married, they said. With four kids? I said? “OK, get
your Spanish hubby to pay alimony. “ I swore up and down that in Mexico City
where I left him, they hadn’t even the word ‘alimony’ in the dictionary. They
showed me the door. But the check came every month. I promptly saw that my
return to California was going to be a cash disaster unless I opened a home
business. I sewed a little but not enough for my first and only job for Drama
Coach Stella Adler which failed miserably. The only other thing I knew how to
do was type fast, and oh yes, interpret a horoscope --so I turned to a typed horoscope
cottage industry, one I surely didn’t tell the DPSS about as they tend to dock
you every cent you make.
I soon was Stargazing to the Stars of Hollywood.
Great business. Took all four kids to Acapulco at a hotel with lizards on the
ceiling, every few years. It turned out that in CALIFORNIA, any old thing you
did could make somebody a living.
If I washed Harleys and called it HAWG-WASH, I’d have thrived. If I cooked
TOFUBURGERS for cafes, I’d have been fine. Things went swimmingly from 1969 til
1986 when my landlord sold the cute
cottage that I rented. I suddenly had to move. After thirty years guiding girls
at my kitchen table or office desk in the heart of Yuppie ville, WEST L.A. I found
WLA had tripled its rents. After searching, I found a cottage with big gardens
for the same price but it was 22 miles NORTH as the crow flies in THE VALLEY.
CRIKEY! There went the neighborhood! I despaired of every attracting an old
client. And sure enough, that move put a 98% dent in my business. I fought back. I used email
announcements, tasty ads, Craigs list and shark-like I moved after the online
client! I was a perfect TYRO, didn’t know how anything worked but ANY EFFORT
paid off. I began to have the same
‘numbers’ as had walked in my door in town, and I was out in the boonies. I
simply did my readings by Phone or typing them into an
EMAIL. Palms were Xeroxed and came to me in the mail. LESS GASOLINE for all
concerned. Although I worked in a
cottage industry called “BEING AN ASTROLOGER.” You, perhaps, are a consultant
for other things. I do believe that the same rules apply.
I began to write articles on GUERILLA CAPITALISM,
MOONLIGHTING, COTTAGE INDUSTRIES & one day I wrote an article about brainstorming up new
things, thinking outside the Box. I read a book called PURPLE COW to assist.
Then I came up with some things. I wrote that up as an article called it “DOUBLE
YOUR BUSINESS “ a concept to inspire home CEOS to find a second or third business that you
could run out of the same office. SIDESELLING I called it.
I made a list of anything and everything I could do.
I could regress people to past lives. True, few people wanted to see their past
lives or even believed in them. Fewer wanted to trek to the VALLEY for it. What
else could I do? Something that would bring in the crowds. It occurred to me
that the great l9th century Hindu Saint Ramakrishna had once said that there
were only two things that make people nuts, love and money. I suspected
I was real ‘up’ on the former. I’d
been a flaming Venus in Aquarius ditz when I was young & I knew a lot about
men, dating and romance from that as well as layers more of info from clients.
Why couldn’t I do a Web Seminar on LOVE?. Over 30 years (at that time,) of
reading stars and palms for clients (I had another 15 years before -- just
doing stars & palms as a
hobby, I don’t count those.) but in 45 years total, I had LEARNED a lot about
WOMEN and their love problems by hearing all those amazing horror stories.
People don’t come to you when things are good, so slowly, I developed a set of
files I call the RUTHLESS RULES OF ROMANCE and I became an online, freebie love
consultant and immediately
started advertising on Craigs
list.
From what clients told me about their lovelife, I
slowly learned what a girl should NOT do. From successful heart breakers, ie. a
lot of movie and rock stars I learned what one SHOULD DO. These gals told me
their wild tricks for nailing men and I pass on those too. After years of practice, I became a love coach, an unshingled Jungian
therapist. An illegal shrink for the lovecrazed. A pirate psychiatrist. I wrote so many files to young ladies, (keeping copies on the
various syndromes and remedies,) that when it came time to create and fill the pages of the LUCK IN LOVE WEBSITE,
where the SUCCESS IN LOVE TRAINING resides in CYBERSPACE, I found I had several
hundred pithy chapters on HOW TO quit your bad habits, spot, meet,
and nail a GOOD MAN and not fall for a bad man. Also puhlenty on how to
MARRY VERY WELL, which means marry WEALTHY! It’s the RUTHLESS RULES OF
ROMANCE, all totally free for the reading. Instant click. No registering at the
gate, just slink right in, gals and get an upgrade.
TO put bread on my table, And bible bread
is currently $3.60 a loaf!, I read horoscopes of the girl and the guy, compare
them, do natal charts, advise clients who what and when, both online and by
phone and for that I get 25$ the hour after all, it isn’t brain surgery.
Actually, it IS! I don't bother with a VISA
or MASTERCARD ACCOUNT as the big boys charge an arm and a leg for that set up. As
my clients met my mind online and read l00 chapters of me, they come in the
door, errr, dial me up, TRUSTING me already. They are also AMUSED by how I ‘word’
the ancient rules of man/woman theosophy. So they can and will mail me a check.
Receiving it, I trust them right
back. Or they pay me online, instant Internet style, an online bank called
PAYPAL. A friend who has check writing software tells me that it’s a better way
and he’ll come install it on my PC soon. I can’t even imagine what that is so
naturally I don’t want it yet. He uses it. Remember that Ramakrishna quote? He
specializes in MONEY. You go broke on debt, he fixes it. Gets paid 400$ so he
doesn’t want any check to bounce. Anyway, I’m not making the national debt of
Greece. So I’m happy with things as they are. I rent, don’t anticipate buying. (I
Researched and Wrote ‘how renters can eat on a dime. And CONFESSIONS
of a Bottom
Feeder, posted them all at the
FRUGAL ARCHIVE.
Those are my credentials, so if you wish, you might
use my business suggestions --- that is, if you are any kind of consultant, a
website designer, a stock advisor or psychologist, develop your unique features
and put it in WEB LINGO. LUCK IN LOVE is alliterative, easy to remember. My SEMINAR
for those who want to do big fun parties for a FEED AFRICAN BABY CHARITY is VULTURESANDWICH.ORG.
The concept and especially the NAME has to be sprightly, young, bombastic, easy
to remember! My daughter Paloma is a sprig off the ole tree, she’s BIG APPLE BABIES, child portraits
in NYC for the Uberwealthy at 500$ a sitting. She meets you in Central park,
shoots you in an hour. Returns to RIVERDALE, their version of the Valley.
I don’t know the cash details of her biz but for me,
there are two ways to make certain that I get the money the client owes A.) By never
doing the work without the check in hand. B.) by keeping my rates real low so
nobody NEEDS to stiff me and C.) By maintaining certain, astringent systems
that are hidden under casual little 'rules.' NEW
CLIENTS come, they always demand a quickie kind of 'give me a reading right
now' situation. THEY ARE IN AN IMPULSE MOOD. They called me out of a
passion throe provoked by the unique wording of my Craigs list Ad. I seemed to
be talking about THEIR LOVE PROBLEM and that is what is eating them. That or
Money. But I don’t specialize in Money, obviously. I hear form them by EMAIL
and then I have to phone them or email them back immediately. When I fail to do
this promptly, the fish swims to another part of the river. The fish forgets.
Your people might be different. It might be that your
clients might want their website looked at, their design choices hammered up,
or their stock buys analyzed. The thing is, you and I have to strike fast to
get them to write the check before they get the hard work
invested by you so I always immediately
--without one second delay ---if I'm on the phone to them, give them a piece
have generalized but quite high level information on their query. It might be
"HOW TO MAKE SURE your mate is true to you? " I'll give some
brilliant hint, say 'have you ever caught him in a little lie? Or, on the other
hand, have you ever heard him tell a truth where that truth compromises
him a little, but as he's so honest, he told you the truth anyway?"
Then I explain how we can test our men
without fully answering her question. I will even email her an article that I
wrote on MEN, WHY THEY LIE, WHAT IT REALLY MEANS. Cuz the truth is, it means
NOTHING! Men are taught at their mother’s skirts to lie like rugs. So
girls, getover it. Especially if he’s the father of your children and works
hard. If he’s a boyfriend, then you can afford to be picky over a liar. Depends
what he’s lying about.
I may send that email right after the
conversation --in case she's forgotten how brilliant the conversation was. I
make certain that my home phone number is on my email, and “love to talk to you
anytime.”
THEN I send my pretty EMAIL AD, which has instructions HOW TO
PAY THRU PAY PAL. It reminds her of the fact that she can get me, any time day
or night, all she needs is my email addie, “astrology at earthlink dot net”…. SHE
has that email now where I give her a second chance to go to her desk, write the check
and mail it or use PAYPAL to send money.
I hope that my advice was worded in such a way that
a.) she got instant mental relief from her anguish, fear and uncertainty and
b.) she sees the wisdom in getting me to further analyze their problem. I might
say “Don’t let this go because the relationship is headed into problems
immediately if you continue to judge him, be paranoid about these little lies
and if you can’t forgive and deal with how he is.” Pay me for one hour we can
go on talking any day this week. Or next week.”
She will want to send me at least my
hour 25$ consultancy fee to get me to give them a professional analysis.
Getting their CHECK by return mail is fine, one in a hundred checks are rubber
and bounce. When you are online, get paid first. NEVER EVER ask for and expect
a check for after the reading is over. THOSE are guaranteed to be rubber
promises cuz they’re written on air! When a client is with me in my office, I
do get paid afterwards.Rubber checks are rarely (once in 30 yrs of readings)
given in person. But we're talking online clients? Get the check
by PAY PAL or the US. POST beforehand!
If they approach me by e-mail I
instantly while they're hot, email them or call them back. Try to do it with a
phone call, so get a PHONE card at 99c store fora penny a minute (!) phone
calls. You can afford to invest 5 minutes in a phone call to a far away city.Last I heard that’s still a
nickel!
AS FOR GIVING THE FULL
READING WHEN THEY FIRST call or write? No, only a few crumbs of it. The big
piece of research work comes ONLY if they cut you a check or send cash with
paypal. If they say you know me, I’m good for it. Say, “I can’t find the love
in my heart that makes me psychic without knowing I am liked. To not pay me and
ask me to work for you is a turn off. Love or friendship is the surest key to my
GUIDE LIGHT being turned on.”
If you don't know the person who sent
them, i.e. their friends – and know them well, (so you could rat them out for
no pay,) and don't know them, NEVER! You can't do freebies with new clients. ONLY
WITH OLD clients, with whom there is a tone of genuine friendship.
If you’re waiting for a check that they
are going to mail, dress up your request. Say " I need to have and know
the many questions that are in your heart so it helps me as a psychic if you
write every question about the lover, the kid, the husband, etc, on a pc of
paper. Mail it to me. Make sure it is handwritten as I get a lot off that. I am
going to cast your horoscope, his, do the research on your chart and the timing
related to questions where timing is a part of the answer. You can't be on the
phone with me when I do the math and research the chart. That's boring private
and meditative work. I spend a few hrs, which I don't charge you for --doing
that study. And so many of the issues involve going thru ephemeris to check
dates that you give me, when the fights occurred, so that the truth will be
visible, and when he is most likely to show his dark side or contrarily when
he’s most prone to actually proposing….when that will come.
ALSO (I tell them, )"as I'm partly
psychic, when I see your handwriting, how you write the word BOYFRIEND, or
write his name I get clues so it is very important. So don't type it. WRITE the
thing out. And I mean give me TEN QUESTIONS or whatever many, but concerns that
are coming right out of your heart. Obviously I also am
gauging that the first question you ask is the main issue....and I see during
progression of your letter how you are a.) coming up with other
related stuff, b.) seeing possible avenues of exit for yourself, or maybe
they’re not possible etc. THEN mail that letter to 3838 Blue Heaven St in MAUI
HAWAII, ( I WISH!) etc, with a 41c stamp.
The day I get it your check, I will
start the math work, the research. I will email you and tell you when you
should phone me. I often LATER will ask them to send Xeroxes of their palms but
only on the second letter as doing that takes so much time they forget me on
the first meeting. And then, I never hear from them again, ever.So I always wait til first reading is completely over with
before I ask for a palm print.
If I am instructing them
about cash realities on an EMAIL….I discuss emotional realities in the body of
the letter. Then, IWRITE OUT A Post Script WHERE WE GET TO THE MONEY SITUATION.
I say, P.S. (as if this were a secondary consideration). Send a check or money
order for an hour research time which refers to the time spent casting the
horoscopes, and then ADD ON THE FEE FOR the hour we will be talking. I don't
charge for all the hrs I actually put into the chart math. Chart research. I'm
25$ the hr. so figure how long we'll talk, etc. 2 hrs is the usual minimum. But if you can’t afford that, that’s o.k. I work an hour and
always give more time.
IF You want to give some
freebie talk in the first few minutes of hearing the client's voice on the
fone, keep it general philosophic information that has very high tone to it. I
use this kind of palaveronline as you know. HIGH
TONED 'how to get lucky in love' articles, or 'how to cook rhubarb, 'why the
Bush family will again betray America type articles, etc.
When I write articles I alwaysinsert my
email and/ormy various websites’ urls. People answer. They find me thru
articles. For the same reason, I offer free garden seeds and bulbs to a list of
l000 names. They send those offers on to their pals and now I can give their
pal the same url, links, 'what's your dob?' let me send you the freebie
dailies. OH, the freebie dailies are a fine way to meet folks. Give them
freebie dailies for a half yr, then say if you want them, it's donation or it's
5$ a month or whatever.
When you think back to how you picked
up clients in 70's, it was at meetings, clubs, groups, or at healthfood store.
You started chatting with someone over say, the big bunch of celery they had
stashed in their basket. “Oh that’s good at chelating the sodium in your veins,
puts it into liquid form so it leaves the body. See it’s organic sodium so it
melts INORGANIC sodium.” The woman would say ‘are you a holistic healer, and it
gave me a chance to say stargazer, palmist, psychic” whip out and hand them my
card. Maybe happened once a day! Today on the net, you can meet 5 people a day.
So our incidence of client attraction is 5 times what it was when we depended
on our car driving our feet to a place!
Now,
for the longtime clients, the fone-in regular crowd you have to run an account,
a bill and time them. WITH THEIR PERMISSION. Say:"JANE,
you want a reading right now, don't you?Well then, tell you what. I'm going to
time our talk and write down the minutes, and add it to the call you made last
week which was l hr long (or better, I'm going to add it to the calls you make
in the coming week, or if they rarely call you, don't say that!) And then I'm
going to bill you by mail or email to your home, you can check it against your
long distance server’s bill and I hope to get a check for 25$ for each hour you
are with me on telephone line. Does that seem fair?”
Or time the hrs I spend researching the
chart and typing it up for you. And bill you. I'll bill you later this week,
ok?"
IF THEY SAY OK, they have given their
word. PEOPLE rarely break their word to their advisor. I jot down hour they
called in, 3:40 pm then when phone call is over, write 5pm, one hour 20 minutes
and go to MICROSOFT word processor files in my CLIENTS directory in the c: or
D: scroll down to clients, enter it into a file JANEBIL.htm or I do it actually
in WORD PERFECT for DOS an old software from the 80’s. For Courtney Love she
had her own DIRECTORY and hers was in Microsoft Word. So I can locate it easily
in the tree with the file manager I use. OR via the word processor I most use.
I ALSO put a notation of
that date Feb 20 --------------1 hr 20min. Next time she calls, I
enter Feb 23 ....15 min.
One client calls daily,
yesterday 2 hrs, swear to God, I was lying in bed with a clicker
on my hand, switching channels randomly a kind of televised card
deck, to get answers to nonsensical questions. 'What does he think of my
beauty? What does he love about my face? She can go on this way for two
hours easy.
I also often do dice, tarot, stars off
a PC with the person's chart but this demented cookie needs a
reading every day. She is a psychic junkie but heiress to a two
hundred year old fortune.
As I have trained this client well, she spends a
luxurious hour or two a day with her new questions, I send a bill once a month.
The amount is more than I spend in a year on food, but who's counting. Not her!
Over the decade, she's only had a check bounce once, and it was good the second
time I put it through. I allow her to write one check for the lst, one for the
15th if she's short, cutting my bill in half momentarily only.
So consider my suggestions and get an online
consultancy business up and going. You will find the INTERNET a fruitful field.
Believe me! And more fruitful, the hours you can spend foodscaping
the garden!
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