THE FALSE FRIEND and the ART OF MAKING REAL FRIENDS.

falsefriends are easy to detect. Horns tail...they're bright red.....WHOOPS! I'm not supposed to tell fairy tales...
Johnny here says he's going to get me into pictures!

How many of you in your lifetime have actually made friends with 'fake humans'? A show of hands please? Yes, quite a few of us have, myself included  Sadly, among our chums are a scattering of 24 karat gold plated heels, the bums, the phony, treacherous lying scum of the earth masquerading as your best AMIGO. They lie, cheat, gossip, tell all your stuff, they can even steal or be violent.

Of course, they're all stupid. Haters always are dull witted. The most dangerous is the explosive RAGEAHOLIC. First four years that she knows you, she complains in a scream of RAGE for hours about her father, brothers, boyfriends, bosses... You know she's a sicko nutjob but hey --you need her to drive you to the market once a week. (And you give her a good astrology/ tarot/ astrodice reading each time, for an hour --to pay her for that drive.) Sure you mirror her accurately,telling her that she TENDS to 'collect' injustices and there's no payoff for that collection.

That truthful mirroring doesn't fix her. She still yells at shop clerks and waitresses (not men oddly enough) & threatens to have them fired. I watched her scream that she would get City of L.A. to close the taco shop as a 14 yr old is working the register, parents not there.

Once a woman needed a cut in line at the supermarket, arms around a bouquet for her own mother's funeral, and she's late..I say 'sure go ahead of us,' the nutjob screams at her, entire market listens as it's LOUD. A MINUTE of screaming.

Then one day she loses her temper at me and pounds me. (I had pointed out this street was not near the doctor's bldg, not his parking lot.) She screamed that IT WAS THE RIGHT PARKING LOT/ HOSPITAL, screams for two excrutiating minutes, then starts HITTING me. HARD! POUNDING my upper arm with all her force. Yes, it happened. I tolerated a devil I thought I needed and got a DEVIL whom I should replace! This one is the bad choice women make with MEN that gets them murdered. I watch "Forensic Files" and they have 24 shows a day of girls getting murdered by men they know.

Sins less than murder can be gruesome. I think of the starlet friend, became a roomie, three years later, she got her own apartment but on the way out, she stole my jewels, wardrobe, antiques, Scalamandre bedspread, the works! Mariana Hill is her name. HIGH PLAINS DRIFTER, GODFATHER II. Another starlet (less famous) took our jointly written manuscript to New York to approach publishers. She wouldn't give me co-writer's rights in a contract before the plane took off. God punished her with no sale! A third starlet was working with Jim Carrey and though I knew her 20 yrs, would not take my script for PERCIVAL a live-action Disney comedy to show him or his agent. Nominated for an Oscar once, she said "He might want to sleep with me. I don't want to ruin it." She tossed and lost my script btw. And Carrey never hit on her.

It's the same story every time you met and all was airy fairy promises, you recreated together in light and joy (though you never noticed they were really using you as an movie extra and the close-up was for them and them only.). Then came the day  you two were gonna hook up for some serious business where actual MONEY could be made and then you find this solid gold chum is a decayed, rusting pot-metal thief dipped in phony gold paint. The bum never planned on sharing half with you. They were using you to get to their aims and they are enfuriated now that you'd ask for part of the winnings! What cloud are you on? they demand.

That actually is the real issue or question. What cloud were you on when you befriended this skunk thinking it was a bunny rabbit and the two of you could pair off? That you could TRUST THEM in the CLINCHES.


You trusted me? You counted on me?
What planet are YOU from? It's ME here!

When we crash into the ground and discover we were depending on a first rate criminal, idiot, liar, phony --- when we find out that we have a skunk by the tail, what do we do? Bust them on their shit? Nahhh. who died and made you God? Analyze only how you were maybe a 'wascally wabbit' yourself at some point and maybe had some ulterior motive up your own sleeve the day you befriended this jerk. Or at very least, you had some bad karma.

Do your own accounts ONLY. To handle theirs you have to wait patiently until the sun gives a couple of whirls and it's their time with the KARMA machine and FATE  hands them their final payment, a big zero and their life isn't working. Wait until they're in tears, they lost the big big enchilada, they come to you as they're amnesiac and beg you, tell them, what happened? Please explain! Then, wait a minute more until they ask you plaintively, 'why do you suppose this happened to me?' At that point you can tell them, Skunky, you were a user, a liar, false friend to all who knew you and not with your enemies where it was maybe appropriate --- but with friends who wanted to love and serve you. You utterly betrayed them and kicked them in the teeth. Consider what everyone who isn't an idiot feels now. They bought into your act. They were bitch-slapped by you. Imagine what they think of you. That you're a greedy fake friend. We all have to guess that you have some kind of anesthesia in the heart center. Not your fault. It's crummy parenting and it's endemic on planet Earth but now that you're at the magical turning point, if you couldn't reorganize your psyche, knowing the truth, and DID NOT, then it WOULD be your fault.

Next question from them should be 'how do I reorganize to become a better person?' The answer is own up, take responsibility, don't blame your parents for turning you into a pirate. Do lots of Prayer, repentance, humility, yoga, to get hold of the will power. Do public service to awaken the supreme spark. Do meditation i.e. reflective honesty, AA style. One of the best ways of doing this that I've heard is to have a conversation with yourself. make sure you're alone in the house, and just go over things while talking. When you hit pay dirt, concretize it. Make your written lists of whom you stole from, lied to, insulted, offended, and plan how to pay them back or apologize, your BERNIE MADOFF list, maybe.

Also the lying phony must start restraining the 'addictions' in the deep libido that caused your crime wave. Like the infamous Madoff, it was lust for the LUXE life. You have to unaddict yourself to greed which let in a lot of harmful mind-rearrangers, unhealthy stultifying costly lifestyle, toxic foods, yearning for poshness, to live like a celeb and watching all those MOVIE TV CELEB shows... and one must dump the addiction to toxic eating, convenient bleariness, stupor and dreamlike ignorance. YEAH there's a will toward IGNORANCE ya know? DENIAL isn't just a river in EGYPT. Scarred people want to tune life out.

THE ART OF FRIENDSHIP - DO this new exercise called MAKING great friends. Great people. Not merely those who SEEM great. They are found in book stores, used books in particular. At classrooms, lectures, yoga classes, at church or Temple.

Not at beer brawls. I have a pal who hits every party he hears about. He's convinced he's God on earth. When he enters a room it's like he's the largest masted/sail ship on the ocean.  He sails into that harbor, everyone else suddenly looks like a rowboat in his wake. Swear to God. he's a total nobody, an utter worm, a ridiculous pretender, but his conscious mind does not know how puffed up and ridiculous he seems as A) he dresses flashily and B.) PEOPLE want to believe. He promises them jobs, trips, fame, wealth. He wraps his lying mouth around actual VOWS to 'give stardom' to girls.

MANY IDIOTS do actually buy into the portrayal of the world's biggest masted ship this side of David Selznick. My chum  has some tiny little producing screen credits (in his own mind only) that he alone recalls --that make him think he's the world's biggest winner, destined for big stuff. He even smokes a cigar at parties! Wears an ascot at lunch on weekends! Reasonable people smell him coming but idiots are impressed and buy stock in a friendship with him!

Accomplished BS artists are like MAGNETS for the 5% of humanity that qualifies for being  tinsel so his entire life (until his crash with gov agencies after him for raising money for films that were never made) was like a LEMMING HITLER out collecting other LEMMINGS, all of whom would follow him to war & go over a cliff with him. Only it  was like following a nobody like "SELIG" that obscure, Kafkaesque Woody Allen character.

The cosmic pretender went everywhere, attracted a small crowd of jerks, yet in the end all were to eat dirt. Nature arranges it. How many pretenders, treacherous friends have dragged you on a fantasy land ride at Dizzyland and have had you in their thrall? Hey, it can happen to smart people. Conditioned by media we tend to believe what is spoken to us.

You have to hear the 'tin' word and edit the makers of fast loopy promises out of your daisy chain. If we had, we would not have elected Clinton or Obama, worse than ten Nixons.  NIXON never lied about what he intended. Clinton and Obama served the transnationals but spoke to the foolish believer in you. Find the foolish believer who craves a fast road to Utopia  and eradicate it before someone genuinely evil, like Hitler, starts whispering to your secret hates, secret racism and you go down the Idiot's road to your own demise led by a false friend.

he got me into photos
        He got me into pictures alright!
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Our POSTER is ANITA SANDS HERNANDEZ, Los Angeles Writer, Futurist, mother of four and career Astrologer. Catch up with her websites  TRUTHS GOV WILL HIDE & NEVER TELL YOU, also The  FUTURE, WHAT'S COMIN' AT YA! FRUGAL LIFE STYLE TIPS,  HOW TO SURVIVE the COMING GREAT DEPRESSION, and Secrets of Nature, HOLISTIC, AFFORDABLE HEALING. Also ARTISANRY FOR EXPORT, EARN EUROS....* Anita is at astrology@earthlink.net ). Get a 15$ natal horoscope "my money/future life" reading now + copy horoscope as a Gif file graphic! No smarter, more accurate career reading out there!

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