THE PRIMAL FEELING PERSON vs the CUT OFF ZOMBIE
GIRL MEETS MAN. GIRL WANTS A ROOF OVER HER HEAD.
MAN WANTS TO PLAY GUITAR, EAT & GET DRUNK, HAVE SEX AND GO TO SLEEP. WHO of the two is the UNFEELING ONE?
(Read this mystery with a surprising ending!)
As an astrologer, palm reader, tarot reader, I find most clients have only two problems. NOT ENOUGH MONEY, NOT ENOUGH LOVE. So I wasn't surprised when into my life came SALLY, a dog trainer, dog sitter, dog walker whose business is called 'Aunt Sally's Dog Sitting'. She'd targeted a real hot dawg, a musician who did 50$ gigs at local clubs. She had befriended this guitarist lyricist, singer who oddly, didn't want sex. Must be the only Rocker Guy on the planet with THAT problem as guys usually go into rock an roll to attract women, maybe he's into ROCKIN' ROLE! Rather than ROCK AND ROLL So over a six month period, she got no sex, just occasional dates. Finally, she was trusted by him enough to convince the guy he should try an E.D. pill and there was finally a little nookie. I must say, she worked it like a surrogate sex therapist and we had discussed how this was a possible career for her in lieu of the not so lucrative dog sitting.
The problem is, six months after they met, RANDY (he' ill named, ) is still 'irregular' in his seeing/ dating her and his 'sleepovers.' She sent me an email today to complain and asked to come in for a horoscope analysis. I emailed her back: "Let's have our own training session here online as I want you to get a few facts under your belt before you come in. You just now WROTE ME: "I told him I was still upset about his putting me off on sex right after we got back from going to dinner. This happened a few days back."
May I answer from the viewpoint of real pain vs. head trips, a view which I developed studying PRIMAL SCREAM THERAPY to REPAIR DEAD HEARTS, back in the 70's, with the ART JANOV LINEAGE?
"Sally dear, what earthly good do you think it does to point out some slight from a few days earlier...48 hrs after Randy was a bad boy? Or what good it does even pointing it out at the time of this sin of 'omission'. We are not any longer in the throes of authentic emotion as you were on that date night. A.) we are in a mental, rational mode and B.) You are trying to get a payoff from a recrimination, from MAKING HIM GUILTY!
IN LIFE THERE IS ONE RULE. Never collect injustices. Bad things to hoard. You must absolutely once and for all STOP COLLECTING 'INJUSTICES'. It's a loser's game. The "JEWISH MOTHER" who operates by making a SON feel guilt turns him into a mess. Google JEWISH MOTHER SYNDROME online and read up on this. Showing a guy hindsight photos of 'Randy Bad Boy' is the one weapon that doesn't work on men. It makes them look at THE WOMAN as if she were nuts and hate us and QUIT US! It is a feeble attempt at emotional blackmail!
Sure, life doesn't give us steak on a platter every night but to bitch to
a guy who's just doin' what comes natchural (sic) at that moment is
folly. Especially since you signed on knowing he didn't have THIS
SITUATION very tightly wired in the first place.
It's like a girl dating a homeless guy and being furious he didn't buy
You say "he made me feel rejected".. A.) YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELF, you
expected dinner from a tramp?? and B.) YOU ARE now trying to COLLECT
INJUSTICES OFF THIS? C.) this is your life pattern, feeling unloved,
and I know this from your telling me about your first thirty days in
hospital then orphanage with Nurses mechanically giving you bottles but
no delicate, tender bonding & ADORATION from a mommy. The horror of that
deeply imprinted a pattern of not FLEEING FROM FEELING so much as being
SO PRIMAL WOUNDED that the heart shut down and you're NUMB. A situation
that you, like all walking wounded, try to RE-LIVE every single day of your life.
SEEKING the restimulation of the primal wound. NO MOTHER AT BIRTH.
WEEPING FOR THIRTY DAYS, IGNORED BY NURSES! Then along comes
adoption, too late to repair thirty days of primal wound.
Not a lot is bandied about in media about the formation of NEUROSIS. --
That area is a vast wilderness, not popularly known about. The VICTIM
unconsciously but with superb aim, seeks to experience the very ORIGINAL
SIN ..over and over again, seeks to FEEL BETRAYED,
UNLOVED, misused, SEPARATED FROM --the beloved
and deliberately picks those WHO REJECT! It is a mobius loop RESTIM
pattern! You spotted a certain lack of enthusiasm for vigorous, romantic bonding in
RANDY from the gitgo. As he has E.D. he did not put the make on you.
You could pursue the distant, receeding, fleeing parent for as long as you wanted
and YOU WANT THAT CONFIGURATION. Your life is an eternal
stalking, seeking, searching, following, craving for a FLEEING LOVE OBJECT.
As the aim of the ID, the desire body, is to win back what was never had, to attain the
thing that ws denied you!
You CHOSE HIM for his QUALITIES. And now you whip him for his 'sin?' which you hand
picked, hand chose? YOU KEEP TELLING HIM he's RUDE, COLD, HURTING YOU?
And when you do that, there is no relief for YOUR ILLNESS, that you were
abandoned at birth, unloved, not HELD. You rae just screaming at RANDY
'YOU ARE NOT HOLDING ME!) YOU ARE NOT TENDER. It is the same old crime
echoing and echoing thru the halls of Sally's latest lifetime. You are
digging the hole deeper and deeper. so D.) STOP THIS LINE OF THINKING!
That's YOUR sick pattern showing up, not his! You aren't gonna whip a
sexually dysfunctional guy into being HOT AND LOVING. Women cannot rape men!
But what you do and unconsciously want to do is "WIN the departing figure of the
absent heart." Hamster treadmill babe. You will wear him out, and as you're heading
for fifty, a few other guys, then it's OVER. You will become the kind of NEIGHBOR
we all fear.
Turn off that damn tv.
I'm callin' the cops on you!
You're killing me with a lack of sleep?
YOU WANNA KILL ME?!
The answer is always YES
Tell me what the heck dya think ya gonna get out of this game? You think
you can train people to be KIND and considerate? Train him to LOVE'
the way that one trains a dog? EVEN A DOG ---if you
make him GUILTY after the fact --doesn't get it. A brutal kind of
imposition of GUILT must be established at the moment of commission of a
sin but not later! Dog mind and Man mind aint too diff. You slap the
offender with a rolled up newspaper the second he says I don't feel like
sex. You say 'no, bad UNLOVING dog' in a loud voice while slapping him with the
newspaper. THAT MIGHT WORK better than trying to come back a few days
later and saying I was hurt. You didn't love. OR better than weeping at your dog,
you pissed on my bed, 'snif sniff' '
So here's what real WOMEN DO when a guy 'slights' them. Here's what you
might do. Experience the primal wound of being unloved to the point that
you are weeping. The key word in that sentence is 'experience' it. I am not saying 'get
really tearful. CRY from the heart! IF YOU CANNOT WEEP for real, he cannot FEEL. Men don't feel all that easily. That isn't their long suit. They have only half a brain, the mental side. We are their PORTAL to 'the other room,' to feeling. If you yourself cannot feel, you cannot criticize him for not feeling! You can't collect
injustices based on HIS being stony, turned off, mental and cold CUZ YOU ARE that in spades. If he's failing in his masculine job (Jungians point out,) to cherish the vulnerable soft gentle, feeling woman, YOU ARE FAILING IN YOUR JOB AS A WOMAN to be the avenue to the world of sensitivity, feeling, emotion, tenderness, etc. that he can't get to on his own. HOW CAN HER CHERISH your vulnerability if you have none. You stand up like a COBRA and HISS but babe, that ain't vulnerability, ya know?
FEELING and letting ourselves FEEL 110% and then WEEPING OUT of true
feeling is the only tool we have to GIVE THEM THE KEY to get thru that
door and you cannot fake it, Meryl (actually Streep can, one of the best
'semblers ever known, I read her palm when she's o screen and see she IS
LIKE A GUY and dissembles being feeling, from the toes up).YOU MUST BE
HURT AND WEEP AND it must be done the very second he commits the
infraction. But you Sally, iron maiden, you don't have a wound zone.
Like most women do. You have the top layer, the ANGER zone and you have
it so THICK that you cannot feel a wound, and /or if you do it's just to
the EGO which is a mental appl. Not a feeling app. (application in
So imagine this: he buys dinner, you two come home, he says no sex,
won't even try, i didn't take my pill. IF YOU FELT THE SORROW, for real,
on this kind of 'mini-infraction' you would suddenly have tears running
down your cheek. "AHhh" you'd cry "you don't love me, you didn't take
your E.D. pill.'' But we know this, weeping cuz a guy didn't love you,
call you, spend enuf time with you, all of those are FORBIDDEN TO SMART
WOMEN as it makes the woman look like a homeless baglady of the
emotions. Demanding, recriminating. A total turn off to a healthy guy
who only wants to CHERISH a woman so much that he must embrace her.
Remember when we first spoke, all I told you those first meetings, when
I heard what you were doing, calling him to ask why he didnt' phone you
up, why he didn't want to come see you, etc, was WARN YOU of lesson one
, last week. NEVER ask a man for more time or more love! The only thing
a woman can rightfully ask a man for is more food or money.
So the only ace we women have in our hands is FEELING with 'the show and
tell' demonstration of tears and they have to be real.
EVER watch a bad actress cry on screen? NOthing touches your heart.
Audience doesn't feel it. But if a very fine actress really feels the
pain on screen, the audience starts sobbing. He has to DO SOMETHING that
makes you weep. A woman say...has a baby, the family is hungry. He
gambled at Casino. Her weeping opens his heart to their plight. He will
not gamble again.
WEEPING is a portal for a man to get through a mental door, a door shut
to him all his life. The world of feeling is BLOCADED TO MEN to a great
extent as his brain is the LEFT BRAIN ONLY. WOmen has left and right
brain. Men cannot get thru that door. LIFE left him without emotions,
able to kill a foe, an enemy a pirate, a bear, kill a bird to eat. WOMAN
was given the RIGHT BRAIN, empathy, emotional, imagination. But not you,
Sally. you are mental so you can't even open that FEELING door to
yourself. Due to primal injury first 30 days of life which left that
I AM BETTING that YOU DO NOT get PRIMAL WOUNDS, ever. Reason is, cuz you are armored like a TANK. WHEN a child is abandoned at birth, left in an orphan's ward for that long, or neglected, not breast feed, not held, not cooed at and held, skin to skin by an adoring caregiver first thirty days infancy, the weeping, fitful, pain-torn infant GOES ROBOT on us. IS MENTAL but that's all. That fact of no
loving at all for one month of life taught you to steel up and go into
your head, stay way from heart, stay mental! You are permanently damaged
and except for therapy that banishes mind entirely (Yoga, meditation,
psychedlelics like LSD that totally obliterate the MIND and all its
programming,) you cannot ever heal.
You have all the symptoms of a mental case. YOU TALK without stopping
for hours at a time, like a parrot on caffeine, without once stopping.
In my entire life, I've never known anyone this 'end of spectrum.' in
that regard. There is no emotion, nothin' but I AM OFFENDED, I AM
ANGRY, I AM EGO UPSET, I AM MENTAL, oh and one more, I CRAVE SEX AS A RELEASE. You have transferred all emotions to your sexual areas-- a very
frequent choice by the walking wounded. (another being oral erotics, ice
cream, chocolate, creamy things, baby tasties) Entertainment. Cheap fun.
A distraction from the central ache of alone-ness.(All she eats is sweetened yogurts, bakery goods).
You have sofar in this life been and become a zombie of the mind..
relegated to the tomb by day, wandering the city looking for
LIFE FORMS to SUCK dry at night and you cannot see it
as this is all you know.
ANOTHER WOMAN who had an intact EMOTIONAL BODY would weep at a slight. Her heart would be stabbed, she'd cry tears. If a man time and again failed her, she would walk away, leave. YOU DO NOT leave, CANNOT cry, cannot feel your OWN PAIN. You cried for thirty days at birth for certain, til the nurses began to HATE YOU! And then you steeled up. Went mental. THIS LIFETIME, your real birth mother both broke the primal tie and assured DESTINY that you her daughter would be like a woman on novocaine forever, or --for this lifetime, really --as you WILL GET ANOTHER LIFETIME and chances of your experiencing such a MOM twice are ZILCH as the universe is karmically forgiving. Even partially pay the bill they don't assign you the jail cell twice, BUT if you really want to assure that you will never ever have this experience of being thrown away at birth in another lifetime, I would in this lifetime get a psych degree and work only in ADOPTION IMPAIRMENT and be a loud loud worker. I'll help you edit and get in mags as this is very important. NO INFANT should even have a MINUTE without a bonding MOTHER. ADOPTION only if THE NEW MOTHER is at the HOSPITAL HELPING OLD MOTHER GIVE BIRTH.
"I Want to come before 4pm "
I can see you. SURE but i'll only say the same damn thing. YOU ARE MORE LIKE A MAN THAN A WOMAN. YOU NEED A MAN who is tender and emotional like a woman, also one who can make your own tender, feeling door open. I doubt such a man exists. God shuts off that YIN TRAIT in any guy with
testosterone. Have no idea how it works but science reports that THIS IS A MECHANISM THAT WORKS. You might believe that you'd enjoy JUST A MAN who had a perpetual need for sex. As in your world, that is currency. But you really need A FEELING MAN, Kind of yin, to pair off or complement your yang. Probably a very tender young woman who was not able to have children, would be your best bet for marriage. Once she had a child, you'd be jealous and hurt the kid, incurring new karma.
RANDY is just a regular guy a lummox who will look at your shrill demands like you're a raging wackjob and turn off. He IS NOT FOR YOU. You must quit him or one day you will put a heavy object thru his skull and end up in jail. (She actually had been jailed for beating up a BF 7 yrs ago, leaving huge bites all over his body.) Instead, get psych degree, write student loans, become an author, and save this piece right here to cache now on your C: drive on a sub directory called MY PSYCHOLOGY CAREER or PSYCH C:\PSYCH and give this life to GOD. Become a lightworker in the temple of ADOPTION CUSTOMS, the temple you were born to repair. Train, baby sit and cure neurotics, not dogs and cats.
You do have an axe to grind but it's not Randy or the other guys who mistreated you. It's your birth MOM. SHe left you abandoned, damaged, set that infant up for becoming a ward in a state nursery handled by workers, fed every 4 hours by the clock who ended up something like a parrot on speed with an attitude. ANYONE who knows you would want to put an axe thru your talky, complaining head, the head that tells US "NOT ENOUGH kindness, not enough love, not enough attention." Take this act on the road, to college. Get a shingle so you can be an authority in this field. Get a life!
A year later, this woman would pound me so hard she'd have killed me had she hit my head. I told her she was turning on the wrong street, not my med appointment street.I shoulda told her she was turning on the WRONG WOMAN.
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