FAMED ASTROLOGER, PALMIST, PSYCHIC
READER, has
had
4 cover
stories
published at DELL HOROSCOPE magazine, is the only stargazer to give free
readings daily to the entire INTERNET, with StarPower
Map of the Month, a POWER HOURS, a SCHEDULING Day-Runner which covers the many
slices of each day, the ‘hourlies,’ often two pages single spaced on a single
day and which gives you the POWER to move at the right time and succeed!
She has often been called the "FIRST LADY of Astrology", "Stargazer to the STARS" "Guru to the Gurus" "Star Reader to the Stars" but what many of you don't know is that she is also an ace at Palm Reading and has actually been reading palms since she was 13 years old ---having been a precocious, troubled teen with WA-AAY too much time on her hands and absentee parents. In the interest of serving her many fans on the INTERNET and her throngs of web students and clients, Anita has developed new services that ALL CAN BE DONE by email!
:THE "FIRST LADY" SERIES:
The
HILLARY-Natal chart, complete, involved ---hence it's gonna cost ya, buddy!
For one thing, you gotta LISTEN to The Hillary go on and on for about 40 pages
of yakkity yak about all this heavy stuff. YOUR LIFE, YOUR ISSUES, defects,
your character, your real talents, your current reality, well, the past,
present and future, your karmic role receptors, for boyfriends, husbands, the
archetypes that make you pick who you picked! How you snafu your own
potential. Your true mission, your social and karmic obligations. It's a real
snore, a HORROR-scope, but elegantly carried off. All I need is your accurate
truthful DOB ---no xerox of palms necessary ---but this takes me longer. I get
real tired doing this one. It's 150$ But it's 40 pages long when I
finish. I work hard, have for years ---not a forty hour week, more like sixty.
I researched and created these astrological concepts. Certainly, I deserve to
be treated better than a measly l50$ but... whatever! If
it's my lot. I'll accept it with dignity. FOR THE TIME BEING until I take
over the State of NEW YORK!!! AND THEN THE WHITE HOUSE! With Bill riding
Shotgun! Serve him right.
THE MAMIE EISENHOWER -FAMILY
HOROSCOPE . This is for the extremely
relationship oriented, family oriented, professional MOTHER. We cast the
horoscopes of your children and analyze them with you and Pop, all together.
You get your natal chart in 12 chapters. Each planet we do, (and we do them one
by one,) we compare it to those other relations, hubby or kids. How that
trait links to that kid, or that mate. And we do all the character traits of
all of you and all the transit action to them with predictions on events,
trends, in next year for both of you. 50 pages long, at least, $175
The MONICA- A refreshing quickie service for the busy executive (with limited time,) interested in a simple palm job. We take both your palms, (PLEASE give them to me now) and set them face down on the surface of a totally warmed up xerox machine. We unzip, we zap. You male this paper to us, you big male hunk you...You enclose 25$ check cash or M.O. and guess what YOU get. After four hours of torturous thrill and longing, by return Email, you will get a ten page document telling you who and what you really are and WHAT YOU REALLY WANT and WHAT THE LIMITS ARE, THE DANGERS ARE, and what unpredictable, temptestuous DESTINY is going to DO to you, you naughty person, you. There will be NO secrets! Nothing held back! The MONICA can see and realize all your deepest buried potential, every fantasy you ever had ---because all you've ever done or ever will DO has left its trace on your hairy palm! 25$ and I am on my knees, your slave, doing the work which you get by return E-MALE. (breathe breathe) The cigar's on me. $25.00e-mailed to you.
The
BARBARA BUSH -Not a natal, just the year
ahead. We SCOPE OUT all THE secret ACTION headed your way in the next YEAR,
stuff you don't know about, so that you can BE ON TOP, BE #1 in the world and
totally stomp everyone else and get ahead. We study this coming year from all
angles. We warn you of every danger, every potential takeover, anywhere you
could lose. You give us the relevant DOB data on any FOE. We help you plot the
way to knock their ass to Cuba. Or if it's Al Gore, show you how to send him
back to the cotton plantation. Tell us what you want, who you want put away---
we do it for you. WE forsee the POWER PERIODS, the DIAMOND DAYS ahead so you
win every election. Puts your HANDS on the HANDLES, gives you Complete CONTROL. $108
THE
JACKIE KENNEDY ONASSIS -We
pick the HOT DATES for your social EVENTS. (i explain the concept in my Cover
Story for DELL HOROSCOPE MAG, "YOUR POWER HOURS" We pick the best
dates for you to give that party so that everybody you meet either likes you,
marries you, gives you money, jewelry or a neat new last name. Give just one
party with MOON conjunct JUPITER and your festive occasions will get written up
in the newspapers and your relatives can get high profile cabinet appointments,
get elected to office and so you can go off and marry foreign men with yachts.
When there are DOOM dates, we see that you're not out in the street head
foolishly bared to the entire CIA and their Cuban-exile snipers. We see to your
survival for the next thirty days and do that every month, a week at a time, it
comes Monday mornings to your email box as an URL or html file. We scrutinize
those 7 days, hour by hour, make predictions, suggest 'best use.' This one
wraps you like a bullet proof vest, forty pages a month but 4 small chapters
come weekly so you can adapt your DAY RUNNER to it. Ask for the Jackie and it
comes automatically once a week on your EMAIL. I have been charging 30$ a month
for the generic version, which just has the planets, and 60$ to 90$ to have it
customized to your natal chart but --for an experimental length of time, --
it's free at website, http://home.earthlink.net/~astrology/star.htm. JACKIE FREE? She'd turn over in her grave! But she's in
her grave, that's how come we can offer this STAR DAILIES, also THE BIBLE OF
PALMISTRY SECRETS drawn from 45 years of palm reading expertise.
THE ROSALYN CARTER – Is something you download free online. Click on: PALM LESSON, palmistry lore handed down from generations of church going women. The first, best and ONLY palmistry lesson you are going to need in your life. BOOK ONE of the Roslyn Bible of Palmistry costs you peanuts. I used to print it out on paper, back in the 70's, charge a genteel, southern 5$. But now as it's on my web page, it's totally free. The Palmistry Bible has clear, easy-to-learn from illustrations that come EMBEDDED in the text of your email, or you can get it hard copy but with today's xerox/ mail costs 10$. If you had the Bible on your e-mail, you could print it out and have a book. Share it if you like. It's the Christian thing to do. As Jimmy is into charitable habitat this is a freebie. No sucking you in and in and into deeper waters each time. Nossir. we are talking middle American generosity and morality. If a palmist sins in her heart it IS a sin! The most the most fairly priced, best and certainly the cheapest (being FREE), most democratic palmistry book anywhere at any price. And everything in it is TRUE. TRUE, you hear? Will all this learning be VALUABLE to you in the future? You won't believe how much this knowledge will uplift your family life. You will not only amaze, amuse and astound your family and friends as you read their palms, you will also be empowered to read palms the way you now read words on a page. You will learn people's deepest darkest secrets without their even knowing you did so. Because The Rosalyn is without guile, sweet. She just takes your hand and says 'mah I see your hand, sir???' Sweet as sugar. And bingo, the whole CIA has your number cuz sure as shit she's working for the Trilateral Comission and Rockefellers and they ARE the CIA!
THE PAT NIXON- So many lovely women never do a damn thing with their life. Yes, we've all seen it, famous, beautiful, important and rich women who are absolutely a BLANK PAGE. These poor boobies missed exploring their true talents, possibly because they never saw them. There's no reason for that NOW! For Only 30$, Anita will cast your natal horoscope and give you a CAREER ANALYSIS and a TRUE MISSION analysis, which is analyzing your ruler, your tenth house (true mission in life) and your sixth house (job), and come up with at least twenty interesting things you were karmically meant to do. NOT MARRIAGE. Not rug rats. ANY female can do THAT! No, we're talking jobs, careers, hobbies. Emailed to you $30.00
THE BETTY FORD-Tell me, if you had met GERALD FORD when he was 25, would you have married him?? NO! Nobody in their right mind would marry Gerry Ford. But what if you could be given a magic lantern, and in it, see what a decent guy he was, or what his true place in history would be and see what the TWO of you would add up to? That this schlepper might one day be better for you than Say--- Nicholas Cage in PEGGY SUE GOT MARRIED? You'd like to know which guy was really going to end up being BILL GATES even though now he was just a gnarly, jerky computer nerd, right? So we do a chart comparison. And this doesn't have to be sweethearts. We can compare you and any tycoon you work with, you and a pal, you and a KID. You and your fav movie star. Give me both your DOB's and we do a compatability analysis that will predict if he can get you to the White House or bore the pants off you and drive you to drink! REMEMBER Poor BETTY and order this one,$60.00 Emailed to YOU.
THE CHELSEA CLINTON -What if you just needed to quick make up your mind, to know which direction you are SUPPOSED to go in. Study business? Get hired by a big corporation or just sit home and daytrade, invest your piggie bank's contents? Or hit a local college? Get a PH.D? And which study discipline? Pre-Med or LAW? Or maybe you're meant to stop cracking books, have a beauty fashion makeover, hang out with society in London and find some bloke with a good job and get married. If you're pondering that many doors, you really need the MISSION POSSIBLE REPORT. This is a quick look at your horoscope's main features, especially the sixth house (job) and the l0th house (true mission, what you promised God you'd do in this incarnation.)15$. Emailed to you.
The BUSH TWINS READING-
Most of us, left to our own devices, do everything right and slowly move uphill
toward goals. What sinks SOME of us is the things we do in an ill thought out flash of a moment that twist our lives thereafter so that OUR LIFE
neverquite recovers. We can go over your natal HOROSCOPE and predict your
quickie tendencies to self destruct, ruin your reputation, harm body, mind and
soul…AND shame your parents and nearly lose them the election ..15$ Emailed
to you
THE LAURA BUSH – For
wives who are asking WHY DID I MARRY THIS
PUTZ and is there ANOTHER GUY in
my FUTURE? The comparison of You and your mate is first, and then a future
reading on chances of a great divorce and a better remarriage. 80$ emailed
to you.
THE MICHELLE OBAMA READING – You
probably know that you’re going to give up your high flying career to marry
him, and have the children and give them full attention only two things worry
you. Is HE worth it? Will he add up to
something in life? Will he always care for you and the babies? Or is he a love
ya and leave ya kind of guy. We look at any man’s horoscope, compare it with
your own, analyze his chances of success, generosity, wealth and the ability to
take care of you and the offspring. And last, his will to stick around, cuz You
are going to give up a lot to be MRS. HIM.
$60.00
THE NANCY KISSINGER – Are
you married to a great man? Want his palm
read so you can hear all about the real him? 20$. You send clear xeroxes plus pers. check, to 7900 Zelzah,
Reseda, CA 91335. Baby palms can be done on a Xerox machine!
PAYPAL sends me your order letter with the recipient’s EMAIL
ADDRESS in it, in the text of letter, and PAYPAL is enough for me to see
the fact that you did pay, so that’s all in one easy step. I instantly shoot
you back an email saying that I GOT the payment. I see the person’s email addie
and I’m going to send you a copy of my letter to them. PAYPAL only needs to
know my EMAIL ADDIE and they know how to send that cash to my
bank. astrology@earthlink.net
is me
If you’re not in a hurry and you actually want to send good money in the mail, write Anita Sands 7900 Zelzah, Reseda CA 91335 and order the FIRST LADY you want! Don't send money. Checks are fine.
